Do you struggle with loneliness because you are in a new environment and have no friends? or do you already have a ton of friends but for some reason, you feel lonely and feel like no one cares?
Has the current COVID-19 lockdown worsened your struggle with loneliness because you are deprived of your usual daily human one-on-one interaction?
Do you often feel like a stranger even in a room full of people that you are acquainted with?
Is your loneliness making you sink into a state of depression?
I have good news for you…. You Are Not Alone!
There are quite a number of people in the same shoes as you;
You are not alone because Jehovah is with You!
Loneliness is the soul feeling isolated from meaningful human connections, feeling misunderstood, out of place, etc.
My Personal Experience
I’ve had my own fair share of loneliness even though I mostly consider myself a lone ranger. In 2016, I moved to London to study for my master’s degree. It was the first time I had ever lived so far away from home and my family; in total, I spent 16 months away from a place I used to call home.
It was a time when I wished I had someone to talk to and often felt overwhelmed by my studies, and the culture shock I had been experiencing. I had tried to attend a few events geared towards young professionals just so I could meet people and make new friends. I even decided to attend a church that was supposed to be “hip” and “fun”. Sadly, my efforts were met with disappointment. I was not making any new friends, neither was I getting less lonely.
However, there was a turning point; a light at the end of the tunnel. Halfway into my postgraduate program, I found community in a bible believing church that God had specifically instructed me to attend.
I met wonderful people, families that I began to relate with as if we had known one another for years. Church Aunties and Uncles who kept encouraging me through my Postgraduate journey as well as my age mates who became my good friends and sisters in Christ. Most of all, this phase helped me in my relationship with God.
The Way out of Loneliness
You can overcome loneliness rather than become overcome by it.
First you have to trust God. Trust that all things work together for good to them that love God and are called according to his purpose and that God’s plans for you are of good and not of evil. Trust that God can use this phase to transform you by letting him use your loneliness to develop a need for you to draw closer to him and use you to serve others in need.
You should also be careful to never make the mistake of trying to fill the void with ungodly vices or empty relationships out of desperation. They will never truly satisfy; they would do more harm than good.
In the midst of loneliness is the desperate need to tell someone how you feel; who better to tell about how you truly feel than your Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ.
Hold on to His words in Matthew 11:28-30 “come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light”.
You can overcome your agonizing loneliness with God’s help.
Ask God to bring you to a community of people that are genuine and will shower you with the love of God. God did not create us to be in isolation, he created especially us women to be relational. Ask God to satisfy your need for deeper friendships and relationships and trust that he will answer your prayer.
Most importantly, you should pray that God gives you insights on what exactly you should be doing during this season and phase of your life. This might include doubling the time you spend alone with God, serving others in need, or rightly tuning your heart to God to receive the spirit-filled dreams and visions that he longs to give you.
Above all, never forget that God is for you and with you!
Biblical Encouragement for the Lonely
Here are some bible verses that will encourage you and help you remember that God is by your side:
Deuteronomy 31:6 “Be strong and of good courage … for the Lord your God, He is the One who goes with you. He will not leave you nor forsake you”
Isaiah 41:13 “For I, the Lord your God, will hold your right hand, saying to you, ‘Fear not, I will help you”
1 Peter 5:7 “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you”
Psalm 68:5-6 “A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows,is God in his holy dwelling.God sets the lonely in families, he leads out the prisoners with singing; but the rebellious live in a sun-scorched land.”
Romans 8:37 “No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us”